Death

Death...

An interesting ponder. We typically don't ponder it until something comes into our life that forces us to face our mortality....or the mortality of those we love.

When I first received the phone call regarding the accident that would claim Taellor's life, I knew that we were at a pivotal place in our life. When I saw her body, God immediately brought Psalm 139 to mind. "I know", He seemed to say. "I knew even before she was born her number of days.". And with that knowledge that I knew He had....I found peace.

I've been watching my dad refuse to eat thinking he can hasten what seems will be...and I don't see it hastening. I observe his desire to know how much longer and, yet, none of us know. My brother tries to encourage my brother to eat anything hoping to extend his life with each added calorie. Truthfully, any of us could go even before he does. Tae's death taught me that.
Our minds seek to exhibit control and order over things that we have no control in....at all. We think we can find security in that knowledge.

But security is only found in Him. A firm foundation. Each day we are given we can choose to embrace and live or we can choose to let it fall as sand through our fingers. We can choose to spend it embracing joy or let despair cloud us. Either way, a day is a day. An ordained day the God has given us. Each minute ours to live.

After Tae died, I was reminded that someday I will stand in front of Him just as she did...and I will stand alone. I choose to stand worthy. Even if it hurts, even if it doesn't seem to sense...God has allowed it and He will make good of it.